1950s: Wonder Bread, Twinkies, Mountain Dew, barbecued bologna roll, Star-Kist Tuna, Cheez Whiz, Coca Cola (six-pack, glass bottles), Del Monte Green Beans, Sugar Frosted Flakes, Imperial Margarine, Crisco, Wesson oil, Libby’s Fruit Cocktail, Velveeta, tuna-potato chip casserole, iceberg lettuce with French dressing, Ritz Crackers, Bisquick, Kraft Miracle Whip, Pream, Instant Lipton Tea, My-T-Fine Pudding, Chef Boy-Ar-Dee Beefaroni, Hormel Spam, Lawry’s Italian Style Spaghetti Sauce Mix packet), Campbell’s Tomato Soup, Tang, Rice-A-Roni, Sweet ‘n Low, Pizza Hut, Certs, Minute Rice, marshmallow Peeps, Pam, Carnation Nonfat Dry Milk, Beech-Nut Food for Babies, Sugar Smacks, Jif, Kentucky Fried Chicken, Shakey’s Pizza, McDonalds 15 cent hamburger
convenience inevitable progress chemistry of joy only the poorest need breastfeed eat homemade whole grain bread
1960s: lasagna with American cheese, Chinese ribs with ketchup, Tab, Cremora, Kellogg’s Pop Tarts, Carnation Instant Breakfast, Awake (synthetic orange juice General Foods), Diet Rite Cola, Shake-n-Bake, Bac*Os, Cool Whip, Pringles, Long John Silver’s Fish ‘n Chips, Metrecal, Doritos, Tums, Kraft Italian Type Grated Parmesan Cheese, Borden’s Whipped Potatoes, Betty Crocker Scalloped Potatoes, Kraft Caramel Topping, Stouffer’s Frozen Spinach Souffle, McDonalds Big Mac
1970s: Hamburger Helper, Starbucks, Miller Lite, Carnation Slender, Pillsbury Buttercream Fudge Frosting Mix, Kikkoman Soy Sauce, Ben & Jerry’s Homemade Ice Cream, Morton’s Honey Buns, Puffa Puffa Rice, Magic Cow, Crispy Critters, Mug-O-Lunch, Ayds Diet Candy, Pillsbury Bundt Cake Mix, Ding Dongs, Domino’s Pizza, Hunt’s Skillet Dinners, Jolly Rancher, Tater Tots, Mama’s Cookies, McDonald’s Happy Meals, Lipton Gigglenoodle Soup, Life Cereal, McDonalds Egg McMuffin
1980s: Newman’s Own Oil and Vinegar Salad Dressing, Classic Coke, Pop Secret Microwave Popcorn, Snapple, Boboli Pizza, Fresh Express “salad in a bag,” Healthy Choice Frozen Dinners, Sugar Free Jell-O, Red Bull Energy Drink, Fruit by the Foot, Cool Ranch Doritos, Equal, California Raisins, Lean Cuisine, Dutch Mill Donuts, Chocolate Twinkies, McDonalds Chicken McNuggets
1990s: Frito-Lay Wow! Potato Chips with Olean, Boca Burger, Prego Pizza Sauce (Campbell’s), Louis Rich turkey bacon, Promise Ultra (Lever Brothers), Snackwell low fat cookies, Fruitopia, AriZona bottled iced tea, Pillsbury One Step Brownie, Splenda, Kid Cuisine Chicken Nuggets, Crystal Pepsi, Lunchables, sun dried tomatoes, Pop Rocks, Handi-Snacks, Butter Buds, Zima, Five Alive, McDonald’s McLean Deluxe
2000s: Food-shaped carb creations, awash in a sea of sodium, high fructose corn syrup, transfats, additives. Epidemic levels of diabetes, obesity, metabolic syndrome, cardiovascular disease, Alzheimer’s, and for the first time, American children whose life expectancy is not as long as their parents’.
neon yellow plastic lure . . .
the food to die for
from Exegesis Jesus: A Poemoir